PRETTY LITTLE LIARS, S5E6: ‘Did you miss me, bitches?’

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By David Oliver

Let’s just pause for a second and come to terms with the fact that even 100 episodes in, we still have no idea who “A” is. Deep breaths, into episode 101.

With a single text message, our four five liars are suddenly thrust back into the mystery they finally thought they were free of: “Did you miss me, bitches?” – “A.” Funny that one of them said that not too long ago…

alison

Alison DiLaurentis (Sasha Pieterse), “Pretty Little Liars,” GIF courtesy of mkserialblog.wordpress.com

Although missing for a second after a second wave of explosion, Toby is fine – only casualty is Toby’s father’s broken leg.

The girls grapple with the fact Shana isn’t “A” – to which Aria brings up a clever point that “she never said she was.” Duh.

In Caleb/Hanna land, things are more awkward than ever – including Caleb’s new look. Does Ravenswood just add Instagram filters wherever it goes? Anyway, he wants Hanna to take this to the cops once and for all. “Hanna, this isn’t a game. ‘A’ blew up a house.” Will anyone on this show ever learn to tell the truth? And in time?

Certainly not “Ezria,” who have yet to talk through their hot kitchen sex. It’s fine though, Ezra is suddenly on #TeamLiar now and wants to help the girls in any way he can. Spencer thankfully reminds Aria that the dude’s a stalker – though that’s not gonna stop Aria, let’s be honest.

 

Speaking of Spencer, with her mother and her crashing in a hotel, Mr. Hastings still won’t admit to what’s really going on and what secret he and Melissa are keeping. Could he really have killed Mrs. DiLaurentis?

Ali receives a creepy video from “A” burying her mother, and of course it automatically deletes itself. I’m pretty sure “A” could just be Snapchatting all these messages.

Personal favorite line of the episode: “Maybe “A” is a person we haven’t thought of yet.” If we seriously haven’t met “A” yet after 100 episodes, it’s hard to believe the showrunners know anything at all.

Spencer tries to get some answers from Nurse Eddie at Radley, but no such luck…until Aria and Ezra later see him via a security camera dropping off a folder at Ezra’s apartment. The folder has a creepy drawing of Mrs. DiLaurentis signed “Bethany Young.” Uh oh.

creepy drawing

Creepy drawing, “Pretty Little Liars,” photo courtesy of @PLLbigA: pic.twitter.com/XCroPCbyLn

Earlier, Hanna decides to help Ali get out of Rosewood. Ali delivers the best line of the episode: “I can’t wait around for answers.” Speaking for the fans, the irony, my GOODNESS.

Meanwhile, Lieut. Tanner pays Ezra a visit while Aria is there (she hides, but come on, Tanner is a cop – she knows someone else is there) and starts trying to make a connection between Ezra and Shana, seemingly trying to prove Shana shot Ezra. Yay? Not sure what this means for Aria’s criminal record though, once the police get to the next part of the story.

Emily and Hanna have a fantastic, juicy fight that brings some more meta elements to light: Hanna wanting to get Ali out of town because of how similar the two now look and how cozy Emily and Ali seem together, holding hands and whatnot. You roll your eyes a lot with this show, but moments like this remind the audience where the character development does in fact lie (lie as in exist, not as this show’s title suggests).

Ali puts on a scarf right before she’s about to head out, along with a convenient stash of IDs and money. But before she can leave, someone clonks her on the back and starts strangling her with said scarf! Emily gets to her in time to fight the attacker off, yet doesn’t have time to pull of the mask. OF COURSE. It’s not “too dark,” you could have seen who it was, don’t treat us like fools.

Later, Ali asks Emily to sleep over. “We’ll just sleep. I promise.” Boo.

emily alison gif

Emily Fields (Shay Mitchell) and Alison DiLaurentis (Sasha Pieterse), “Pretty Little Liars,” GIF courtesy of degrassi.wikia.com

In other news, Mrs. Hastings and Spencer are moving back in, but Mr. Hastings is out. According to Mrs. Hastings, he’s had enough chances. Are Emily’s parents the only ones who have stuck it out on this show?

Aria decides to volunteer at Radley Sanitarium…which I just discovered while perusing the Internet is an anagram for ‘A Dilaurentis Army.’ Whatever that means.

Also, Lieut. Tanner needs Ali and her father to come in to the station and talk about Shana, and “A” sends Ali the final text of the episode. “Time for the caged bird to sing.” – A

The end credits feature “A” sending a condolence bouquet to Shana’s family. Haven’t you missed these teasers?

More quick hits:

– #TeamTravis – good job getting out of this relationship, dude, because Hanna and Caleb apparently can’t stop thinking about each other. Well, Hanna can’t.

– Lieut. Tanner: “So much tragedy for a small town.” Why is everything she says so ominous?

– Who is Bethany Young?! And that creepy drawing? Aren’t a lot of people good artists on this show? Is Bethany Young just a code name for someone we already know?

– Ezra, why do you still have security cameras up? Aren’t we supposed to trust you again?

– Why is Aria’s dad in Syracuse? In fact, where are everyone’s parents half the time? These girls should really just graduate already, they’re pretty independent.

– Why do we care about Paige anymore? That dead rat in her locker was weird and a little too subtle for “A” – perhaps Lucas? Mona? Also, Ali and Emily are getting pretty hot and heavy, after all. But could that relationship seriously work?

Whew, you’re a mouthful, #PLL. For more Pretty Little Liars recaps and Binge Central news, keep checking back and looking around our site for the latest.

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